I’m somewhere I never thought I’d be

Crystal Uncategorized

I turn 30 this year. I am married, with a kid and two dogs, and I’m living with my parents.

Surprise! The problem we ran into in Puerto Viejo since I lost my job was that with Jonathan picking up work, I became the full time care taker and didn’t have time to really look for and dig into more lucrative work. And while between the two of us, we were able to stay afloat, I needed more time to get us ahead, and so three weeks ago we made the decision to move in with my parents until we figure out our next step.

When I left for college just before turning 18, I vowed never to live with my parents again. Until now, the longest I’d stayed in my childhood home since then was three weeks over one Christmas vacation. Yet here I am, the quintessential millennial.

I have this hovering expectation that society is looking down on me for this. It’s built into the questions, “Are you going to find a local job while you’re here?” “What is Jonathan doing?”

The answers are no and hopefully full-time dadding. Those answers haven’t changed. They’ve been the same goals since I lost my job in November. I’ve been applying to jobs like crazy and doing freelance work, and hopefully with our change of circumstance, we’ll be able to get back to where we want to be.

We resisted this move. When I found out about the job, we were actually on a three day visit to my parents’ house to pick up our dogs and bring them back to Costa Rica. We debated cancelling our tickets and staying then, but instead we decided to go back and see how things played out. And I’m so glad we did. On a very basic level, I despise winter, so we got to skip the worst of it in Costa Rica. But we also got to spend a few last months with our friends, and start to introduce Alex to the town that we love.

But we were wearing thin. Jonathan was working full days, and I was frustrated at my lack of time to work. When he got home, he’d be tired from a physically intense day. I’d be tired from trying to find bits and pieces of time to work. We’d stopped moving forward. Still, we resisted. But like I said in my last post, it’s all about your mindset. I changed the questions we were asking ourselves.

“What if we go somewhere new?”

A month before, I’d shifted from applying for remote-only positions (which had fallen silent over the last month) to looking for jobs back in Nashville. Still, nothing was coming through on that front. But what if I started applying to new places. We’d never lived out west. So we changed our goal, and made my parents our stop-over point. While we don’t know how long we’ll be here, we’re able to enjoy however long we get to be here because we know we have our next step forward in mind.

I’d love to hear about a time when you ended up somewhere you never thought you’d be, and whether it ended up good or bad for you!